shut the door. don't let in.
they will rob you. if you do.
and you will be left empty. inside.
you would want them to visit again. still.
and hating them for it too.

you will keep biting on that bruised lip.
taste your own blood.
and like it too.
all the while hating them for it.
so guard your sanity.
take one step at a time.

shut the door. before they barge in.

Tsim Tsa Tui Waterfront. 17.12.05. Afternoon.

ever gazed at
sun kissed water
star spangled

ever counted the sparkles
one two three four
there... there one more

rise and fall
small-er and yet small

ever dipped a finger
to pickup the glitter

i picked up one
and put on my lashes
and let it fall
it tasted like a tear
salt sprinkled sparkle

only...
this time it wasn't my own

patches of color

a


i paint with fervor
patches of color
one beneath the other
over and over

the dark canvas that i behold
stories darker, never to be told
my mind darker still
like a lonesome night, that stands still

yet, i paint with fervor
patches of color
one beneath the other
over and over

a dash of red here
some yellow there
yellow and red dance up a flare
yet, the canvas remains dismal and bare

so i paint with fervor
patches of color
one beneath the other
over and over

i fervently paint
green, a somber tint
yellow that burns bright
and illumines the dark night
there still resides
the darker night inside
that so longs to be painted bright

so i paint with fervor
patches of color
one beneath the other
over and over

at dawn, my patches come to life
all is forgotten, all pain and strife.
my canvas is dark still, but not quite
for the hopeful colors burn bright
just like it is in life

and before i bid adieu
i gift my color of life to you

unspoken words. arms around me.

a

Stanley beach, last year.

unspoken words
some possessiveness
arms around me
and that assurance
that you will be there
always there

early mornings
coffee in bed
misty mornings
cuddles in bed
just lie there
unspoken words
some possessiveness
arms around me

early mornings
sleepy eyes
filled with mischief
tousled hair
on the pillow
on you
just lie there
unspoken words
some possessiveness
arms around me

a warm embrace
a pleasant surprise
a kiss on the neck
whispers in my ears
unspoken words
some possessiveness
arms around me

why did you
why didn't you
feigned tantrums
some appeasing
and through it all
some possessiveness
unspoken words
and then your arms around me

a hard days work
home and you
not the words i love you
just the words I'll be there
and that assurance
that you will be there
always there

cotton wool clouds

a


how nice it would be
to feel free
light at heart
not soaking wet
and heavy

to glide through life
detached, yet together
but detached

like
cotton wool clouds
clustered together
yet apart

buoyant and carefree
how nice it would be

blue window

a


blue, past the window
mellow and luminous make love
languid, stretching, seamless
intrusive horizon, none
merry shades just round the corner
there, do you see that?
right after the somber ones
like you and me
like us, like 'was'
most of the time...

blue, past the window
vast, intimidating, unfathomable
distant, like a third person
that i observe
intrusive horizon, faint
yet there
there, do you see that?
like you and me, me and you
not us, like 'is'
most of the time...

edge

i stand at the edge of my world
like a twig about to drop
the vastness of the sea beneath me
the triviality of my world behind me
i wonder
is this how it feels
when one is at the edge of an end?
one feet lingering outside of the edge,
into nothingness
and one that holds on to everything else

dark curls blow in the wind
as if, to pull me away from the leap
as i lean towards the vastness
i glance at my world from the corner of my eye
that little cottage at the edge
that tilts, much like me
but never leaves the edge
unlike me

and then, not today i thought
its evening
time for you to come back, perhaps
to that world of mine by the edge
i shall take the leap, tomorrow
perhaps...